A Philadelphia pet shop expecting a shipment of exotic fish instead received a much more disturbing delivery Tuesday.*Poor Fishies!
Philadelphia Police were called to Pets Plus USA on the Roosevelt Boulevard after reports of a large package containing the body of a man in his 60s.
It was hoped that feathers would fly when two rare male blue ducks were introduced to the only female of their species in Britain.
Ben and Jerry were meant to fall for Cherry and help produce some much-needed ducklings.
Instead, the two drakes only had eyes for each other – and have been inseparable ever since.
*Poor Cherry! Single women always say that all the good men are gay. I guess that's true for ducks too.
Sheboygan police say they were able to track down a theft suspect because he left behind his library card, which he apparently used to try to unlock a tavern door. Thirty-four-year-old Kristopher G. Lehnhardt was charged Friday with misdemeanor counts of theft and property damage.*File this one under Stupid Criminals.